The running gag: Monkeys stand for honesty; Giraffes are insincere.

This past weekend, we wanted to do things that real Romans do. Forget all that tourist business. So on Saturday, off we went to the Bioparco di Roma, the Roman zoo. We were partially expecting to find rows of cages with pacing exotic beasts in the style of certain past Roman entertainments, but fortunately we were met with an awesome wonderland in the American style with enclosures and proper habitats for a wide variety of animals. We saw:

As adorable as these animals are, they were no match for the tiny Italian children running around everywhere. The zoo was pretty empty, save us and Italian parents and their kids. We were certainly the only Americans [slash] English speakers there, and since our Italian comprehension level is not exactly the best, we loved being around the kids because they spoke simply enough for us to understand. If there was ever any doubt, small children speaking a language other than English – especially if they’re speaking Italian – are the cutest sentient beings ever made. They would shout excitedly to their parents or cry out in sudden fear – absolutely amazing. One little boy just could not figure out how to say the word “ippopotomo,” which admittedly is difficult to say, in English or Italian. In response to the intense ticking of our collective biological clock, we resolved to simply steal a little kid and take it home with us. I knew that spare room would come in handy!

LEMURS ARE REALLY COOL. So are we.

Speaking of cool…

Sunday we ventured to Mussolini’s grand Stadio Olimpico to see some footballers. Unfortunately we couldn’t get tickets to see Roma play, so instead we saw this area’s other home team, S.S. Lazio. The region that Rome is in is called Lazio, literally the land of the Latins (taken from antiquity), and is very analogous to an American state. They were playing the rival city team of Udinese. Neither team is very good (though both are in Serie A) and this game was fairly unimportant and on a Sunday afternoon, so the stadium was pretty deserted. However, it was still really awesome to see what all the fuss is about. Even the few people who were there went crazy at the (legitimately) bad calls by the referee as Lazio ultimately lost 1-0. The curses we heard ran the gauntlet of Italian curse words, ranging from “bufone,” meaning clown or buffoon, to things much, much worse.

Seeing all the scarves waving and hearing Lazio’s fight song, one could imagine what this massive stadium would be like when it’s full. We’re going to try to get tickets to a cross-town shootout between Roma and Lazio, but it will probably be sold out. Check out my pics!